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Issue 2; Gym Etiquette, Do’s, Don’ts and Why Bother?

By T W Coombs

It is coming up on that time of year when everyone has spent a few days indulging themselves and want to better themselves for the classic new year’s resolution.  And normally this involves signing up to the local gym and even though it is a common conception that after a few weeks most stop going and end of up just paying a bill for the next twelve months.  To help you keep up with something which is worth doing I have put together some reasons to actually go and some rules whilst you are there to keep yourself and other gym users happy.

Firstly the ultimate question, why join a gym? This is an obvious answer which is to get fit and to make you feel and look better.  This is what your trainer will tell you at an induction and they will say you will have more energy and things that used to tire you out will now be fine.  One thing I will tell you, more energy? A bit but most of it will be used going to the gym, so it just fuels itself.  But you will feel better in yourself and that is why you have joined for yourself.

So for all the health benefits of joining a gym the real reason you should be joining a gym is because you want to, not because your friend goes, or because you should join one, one reason and one reason only, you want to.  The reason many people pay then don’t go, is because they didn't really want to join a gym anyway so after the induction they run away, well walk lightly, because that really muscled bloke who showed them round and sorted out their plan was scary and was like an army major.  Trainers aren't really scary or horrible but I have heard them spoken about like this.  You only get the scary shouting man or woman and spin classes or if you pay for the privilege.  If you don’t feel any benefit to you or your life then maybe the gym isn't for you, but do give it an honest go.  And one thing if it is your self esteem that is stopping you because unlike the guy on the treadmill you wobble when you run, don’t worry about it for one good reason.  Everyone at the gym who is actually working out looks like shit, hot, covered in sweat and ready to drop to their knees, so don’t panic, whatever your build or reason for the gym you will find the nicest people at the gym.

Now for the Do’s and Don’ts, this is a list of things to keep to, especially if you are at my gym when I'm there.

  • Respect other Gym goers at all times
  • Be friendly
  • Wipe down all machines after use, even if you can’t see sweat
  • Wear appropriate gym gear (converse are for the pub not the gym nor them trainers with toes, weird)
  • Be careful with all machines, slamming weight arms down will break machines for all, ease them to the resting spot
  • Have a small gym towel to wipe yourself so not dripping sweat on the floor and use for 3rd Do above
  • Comment on any other gym goer, ever
  • Where giant headphones, you are not here to be cool and no one wants to hear your new Bieber album, ear buds are fine
  • Come to the gym in jeans or your work gear covered in mud and ripped t-shirt, just because you work from a van doesn't mean you should look like you live out of one
  • Hog a machine, there are other people who may want to use it
  • Smartphone usage to a minimum or for music only and not Facebook at all
  • Spend more time on your phone than doing a set, it annoys everyone
  • Leave sweat on a machine, it is disgusting (sadly happens in many gyms, often, see Do’s)
  • Stare at the women in the gym even if they look amazing in Lycra it is crude
  • Wear headbands and wristbands if you don’t use them, you just look like a twat or some sort of 80’s tennis player
If you follow these then you will have a great time and so will all your other gym friends.  Finally keep away from the meat head, they usually frequent the free weights and have not much intelligence.  This is not a muscle thing, it is just an attitude they have, and not all muscled guys are meat heads, please be aware of this fact.  The meat heads is stupid, rude and also think they own the gym but they usually stay in their little groups but can be quite loud.

Have a happy gym time.